Leaving to Come Home
/There is the fear of being away from home and my loved ones for an extended period of time. A fear of leaving people and stuff behind. It’s funny, there is less fear about the unknown and what lies ahead, and more fear about letting go. I really want to do something about the worrying and fears. Letting go of those two things are desperately need. This is part of the work I want to do to find that “best version” of myself.
Another great quote, this one from Lao Tzu. It speaks to me and informs me about what I’m feeling and why.
“If you are depressed you are living in the past.
If you are anxious you are living in the future.
If you are at peace you are living in the present.”
Regrets of the past, anxiety of the future, worries and fears. “If you are at peace you are living in the present.” If you are living in the present, then you are at peace. With each mile I ride I’m affirming that I’m letting go of regrets of the past, anxiety of the future, worries and fears.
I know once the wheels start turning, that over time I’ll find the rhythm of the road. The idea of “leaving” on what is a long trip for me (not long for others who have spent years on the road) brings a lot of emotion to the surface.
Leaving home and the people you love for a journey of self-discovery requires that you let go. This is not abandoning the people and the life you love. It is letting go of your control and your fears of what might or might not happen. It’s accepting that you don’t have to carry the weight of the past or the anxiety of the future. It’s giving yourself permission to live in the moment. “Take some time to smell the roses.” We’ve all heard that. Smelling the roses is not the distraction we seek from life, it is truly living. Being grateful and mindful of all the moments that make up your life. I do feel, and my hope is that leaving home on this journey will allow me to come home as a better human being. I’m leaving to come home.
